I didn't really have a picture to go along with this blog but I thought this one was close. This is just a little about what has been going on with me and the kids lately.
A few weeks ago I thought it would be fun to take Ben to the water park all by myself. It was a nice day and I had a change of clothes for him in the car anyway so I thought, why not? Well, there apparently are many reasons that I shouldn't have taken Ben to the park that day. We were only going to be there for a short while, so when Ben took @ least 20min. to get near the park I was almost getting ready to leave. Quinlan was hungry or sleepy (really he just didn't know what he wanted and was screaming) and didn't want to be there @ all. I thought @ least Benard is finally playing and I didn't want to take him away that instant. I let him play for a little while and when the screaming got too much for me I went to get Ben and that was when it all fell apart. Ben is starting to melt down every time we leave a place he wants to be. By the time I was walking away from the park I had two screaming kids. Halfway to the car Ben fell out of the stroller and I had to carry him the rest of the way.
This was not a fun day and the bad day didn't end when we got to the car. Ben screamed for the majority of the remainder of the day. That is not the point though.
So this was a few weeks ago and I hadn't had the courage to venture to the park with the kids alone since. We just play out side around the yard and never went too far away so if there were screaming babies of toddlers that melted down we could just go inside and deal with it that way. Today we were all having good morning, so I made a plan in my head about what I would do if things went wrong again and we walked to Mill Lake.
Most of our walk was good. We walked straight to the mall to say hi to mom/grandma and then got a cold drink and walk to what we call the pirate park. It doesn't have the water park so I though we would start there. When we got there, there were school aged kids playing on the park and Ben always thinks he can keep up to them and he actually ran off with them @ one point. He was pretty good @ the park, it was challenging though to sit and feed Quinlan and keep an eye on Benard and make sure that he didn't climb to high with the big kids. After I fed Quinlan though he didn't want to be there anymore, so I had to get Ben and get going home. Ben was good about getting to the stroller this time and promptly I smelt him. So I went to change him and found that I had not packed any wipes in the bag. So I was trying to get his pants back on so we could just go home with a smelly boy. I think someone next to me was trying to talk to me, but I was detracted by the screaming baby and upset toddler so I didn't hear them until they got super close. She was trying to offer me some wipes. It was so nice of her. So I cleaned Ben up and got him dressed and he ran off. By the time we left the park though, I realized that I was just over reacting to everything and both kids were happy in the stroller and we walked home.
Some days all the little things seem big and when I look back on them I have to laugh @ myself because it is just a day with two kids and their different needs. I love them and am tying to learn who they are so that I can't better parent them. This is a one day @ a time thing and I need to remember to take a deep breath most days and see the bigger picture.
